3. My Will vs. God's Will

Okay. So I had three tests right in a row this week. Man, that was tough! I always hated in high school when you would have several tests the same day or like five over two days because teachers thought we should be able to handle it; you know, it was preparing us for college where teachers don't schedule their tests around other teacher's tests. But anyway, I think I did well. I tend to stress out about anything and everything more than I should, especially grades. In high school, I maintained a 4.0 and graduated 7 in my class of 305 (This is not to brag, I promise. Sorry if it comes across that way.). I stressed about my grades and sometimes even made myself sick because I would get so uptight about my grades. As most of you probably know because we have several classes together because it seems that everyone in the freshman class has the same major, and that is pre-med. I am a Chemistry Pre-Med major. This road can get a little tough. Okay, it will be extremely difficult. This week, I was talking to a friend, who is a nursing major and is in her last year of nursing school. She was talking about how tough it was and how she did not do as well on some of her tests as she would have liked. She reminded me that she will still be a nurse just like the person who will graduate first in her class. It doesn't matter what grades (to an extent) that I make. I will still be a doctor and the person who has the highest average and ranked first will still be one. That really stuck with me. So, what if I make a B. It will not be the end of the world.
There were several things in high school that I had set to attain my senior year. Things like being an escort for Homecoming Court, being a beau in the Beauty and Beau Pageant, winning the AP Chemistry Subject Area Award, being star student, being Hall of Fame are a few. I didn't get any of these. God has a plan for my life and I do not know what that is. He will provide for our needs. He blessed me with a gifted talent of speaking and I was able to use that to win 2nd place at the State Speaker's Tournament and win scholarship money at Mississippi College. He also blessed me with determination and after taking the ACT over twelve times I finally received a score high enough to get MESG, scholarship money that was greatly accepted. God has amazing things in store for my life. I do not know what they are. He had some reason for not allowing me to obtain any of my goals my senior year, but I know he has got some incredible opportunities for me at Mississippi College and I can not wait for what he has planned for life here in the next four years.
Overall, this week has been great. I did really well on my tests that I had. ( or at least I think I did. :) ) We had an ISEC Game Night in the cafeteria that was a lot of fun. Then, on Thursday, we had a general rush meeting. I am really excited about rushing. It will be alot of fun. On Friday and Saturday, I attended the rush skits and they were hilarious. I had so much fun. After the skits I attended two after parties. I got to get my groove on! It was the best. I love to dance.

2. Do you mean it?

I received a prayer card from one of my friends who is going to be a journeyman in Africa for two years this week. Something really struck me as I read it. How many of us have told a friend, "Oh I am praying for you." or "Yeah. I will pray for you," and really meant it? We always tell people that we will pray for them but how many of us actually devote our lives and hearts to prayer. James 5:16 says, "Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you can be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective." Now granted some of you probably mean it and are continually bathing your day in prayer but I just wonder when someone says that they are praying for me if they really mean it. So remember that: the next time you tell someone that you are praying for them, mean it; but if you don't then don't say it. God says to lift everything to Him in prayer and he will answer. It may not be the answer you wanted to hear but it is God's plan for your life.
Also, along with this is the issue of love. Now don't deny it. You know that you have all told a friend, a boyfriend of girlfriend, or someone that you loved them. But did you really mean it? I highly doubt it. If you want to know what real love is, take a look at Jesus. Jesus died on the cross for our sins, when he had done nothing wrong. He took our shame and blame and bore it Himself. That is real love, unconditional, abounding, true love. So the next time you think you have to say those three little words, "I love you," don't unless you really and honestly mean it. Now, I know there comes that point in a relationship where two people know that they really love each other and I accept that. But don't just throw those small words around like that. They are some heavy stuff.
So, this week has been pretty good. I did really well on my first official test as a college student and have three more this week (BUH!!). I am really excited that rush is about to start. I am really nervous though because my major takes up a lot of time with homework and studying and rush will pretty much consume my life for the next couple of months, but it will be worth it. Well, the Choctaws were amazing tonight. Congrats to our football team.

1. Random Thoughts

Hey guys! Alright well I guess I can tell you a little bit about myself because that is what most people have done. I have lived my whole life in Clinton so growing up I always said and knew that I would never end up here at Mississippi College. But I guess God had other plans for my life. I am a Chemistry Pre-Med major and I love it. I really want to work with kids. My passion is missions and I hope to use my career in the medical field as a way to share the Gospel through medical missions. I have had the opportunity to work with kids on a few mission trips and it is a joy to see the smile on their face after you have spent time with them and just loved on them. I live in Chrestman (a huge step-up from The Whit) with mostly every other freshman. I plan to rush Shawreth, play in Intramurals, become involved in BSU, SGA, and Scouts. I am a member of the college ministry at FBC Clinton.
One thing that God has really laid on my heart is just allowing Him to use me and to show me His will for my life. I struggled with that my senior year in high school. I had set out goals and achievements I wanted to receive throughout my senior year. Being an escort in either Homecoming or Arrow Court, a beau in the Beauty and Beau Pageant, Hall of Fame, winning the AP Chemistry award, and receiving at least a 29 on my ACT so I could recieve MESG names a few. So after I did not receive anything I of course became a little bummed. This summer I went to Montana on a mission trip and I was sitting outside, surrounded by the gorgeous scenery that God has created, talking to one of my friends. She said God has amazing and wonderful things in store for your life at Mississippi College. This was just not in His will for your life. That is when it hit me. I had not been living my life according to His will; I had been living my life doing what I wanted just hoping that it was what he wanted for my life. I need to let God direct my paths and let him lead me where He wants to take me in this new journey of my life. He knows exactly what I need and all those achievements I had set out to win and accomplish was not what He wanted for my life. However, after taking the ACT, making the same score several times in a row, about 12 times, I was finally blessed with the score of 30. ( This is not to brag; this is just to show that God works.) This score gave me more money for scholarships which was a huge blessing since we already have to pay an arm and a leg to come here.
Secondly, throughout high school the main crowd of friends that I hung out with consisted of girls. I had a few guys that I hung out with. Most of the guys I used to hang out with started getting involved in stuff that I did not approve of and I wanted to take no part in it. Therefore, I would hang out with girls all the time. One thing that I hoped to develop by coming to college, especially at Mississippi College, was a strong group of guys that I could form an accountability group with. I have met some incredible guys and it has truly been a blessing in my life to see how God has brought these guys into my life at this point in my life.
Well, I just got back from the State vs. Auburn game. I am now hanging out with him and some of his friends at his house. I came up this weekend to spend some time with my brother, who is a senior mechanical engineering major. I had also never attended Bulldog Bash and it was this weekend. It was quite the interesting experience. Matt Wertz and Gavin Degraw were great. It was a pathetic scene to watch. THE MAXIMUM SCORE WAS A THREE. Really? I think both teams could have done better, but especially Mississippi State.