7. Father Forgive Them

Father, Forgive Them

“I used to have golf balls in the glove compartment. When I drove down the road and someone cut me off, I would drive ahead of them, take a golf ball, and toss it out of my sun-roof, hoping it would dent the car that had cut me off.” Now, I really didn’t do this, although, sometimes, I wish I could. This was a conversation I heard from Rob Bell‘s Nooma video clip, Luggage. But haven’t we all done things like that? We are so caught up in seeking revenge--only to find that revenge does not satisfy.
About a year ago, I went through a rough time with one of my good friends. She had done some things that had really hurt me and I held a grudge, not wanting to forget those past actions. Proverbs 16:25 says, "There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death." I discovered firsthand the energy it takes to harbor anger, hatred, and resentment towards others. It is exhausting. Every bit of energy we give to negative activities and dwelling on regrets, robs us of the energy we need to become the person God wants us to be. Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend, co-authors of Safe People, state that safe relationships, those that involve people helping you become more like Christ, are grounded in forgiveness. I eventually said that I had forgiven her. But I didn’t mean it. I never wanted to forget what she had done. But Beth Moore, the speaker and author of Breaking Free, said, “Forgiving someone doesn’t mean that what they did was alright. Forgiveness is doing what God has told us to do and then leaving the revenge to Him.” Forgiveness does not mean what my friend did was acceptable; it just means that I must not let her past actions bring me any further resentment, anger, or pain. I had discovered what Archibald Hart said in Love Must be Tough, was true “Forgiveness is surrendering my right to hurt you for hurting me.”
If anyone had a reason to feel anger or harbor unforgiveness it was Joseph. His story can be found in Genesis 37. Joseph, one of Jacob’s twelve sons, was obviously his father’s favorite. This caused his eleven brothers to hate and resent him. Their hatred was so strong they plotted to kill him but settled with only selling him to slave traders. This horrible journey, however, ended with Joseph emerging as ruler of all Egypt. Years later, a famine struck his homeland, causing his brothers to come and seek grain in Egypt. They did not recognize Joseph when they approached him to ask for grain. Joseph, however, recognized them! When Joseph finally revealed himself to his brothers and forgave them for every cruel thing they had done to him, he said, “You meant this for evil. But God meant this for good.” We, too, should forgive those who have wronged us no matter what they have done.
William Arthur Ward, author of Thoughts of a Christian Optimist, expressed his belief on forgiveness when he said, “We are most like beasts when we kill. We are most like men when we judge. We are most like God when we forgive.” Imagine the courage and the strength it would take for someone to forgive the murderer of a family member. Corrie ten Boom was arrested and imprisoned during the Holocaust for hiding Jews in her home. She was sent to Ravensbruck Concentration Camp along with her sister, who was murdered just days before Corrie’s release on December 31, 1944. A few years later as she traveled throughout Germany spreading the message that God forgives, she saw him- the guard from the concentration camp, the one who had abused and murdered her sister. The thoughts and the sights of that horrible and terrifying place began to pour into her memory. After her speech the guard approached Corrie and said that he had become a Christian. He stated he knew that God had forgiven him for all the cruel things he had done, but now he needed her forgiveness too. He stretched out his arm and asked, “Will you forgive me?” As difficult as it was, Corrie knew she must forgive, for the Bible teaches in Matthew 6:15, “If you do not forgive men their sins, then neither will your Father in Heaven forgive your sins.” After prayer, she stretched out her arm and with a current of healing warmth filling her whole body, she cried, “I forgive you, brother! With all my heart!”
Rob Bell concluded, “Maybe a friend turned their back on you. Maybe someone you love betrayed you. We all have wounds and we end up carrying around these things that people have done to us for weeks, months, and sometimes even years. It isn’t always easy to forgive these people and after a while these hurts can get really heavy. So the only way to feel better seems to be somehow getting back at the people that hurt us, to get revenge. But does revenge ever truly satisfy? Perhaps forgiveness isn’t something you do for someone else. Perhaps forgiveness is about you. God didn’t create you to carry these wounds around. God created you to be free.” Just imagine what it must have been like to be Jesus Christ, the perfect Son of God who was crucified on the cross for our sins when he had done nothing wrong; but still he chose to forgive, stretching out his hands to his Heavenly Father and saying, “Father, forgive them for they know what not they do.” Let forgiveness set you free.